Relationships are a funny thing, You know when that honeymoon period is over and you truly bed in with your home comforts like, wearing your trackies at all times, farting unexpectedly in bed, leaving your dirty undies on the bathroom floor, your hair clogging up the bath … You know when you just get totally comfortable and forget that you’re meant to be this perfect person your partner first met when you were dating? If you’re nodding to this then read on as I’ve flipped it and instead of admitting my flaws I’m going In with what it’s really like when you move in with your man ….
What Really Goes On When You Move In Together
I have no idea why it’s hard to put darks with darks, lights with lights and whites with ONLY whites ? I have pink tops that are now grey and white underwear that are an array of different colours, a bit like dip dye.
WAVE BYE BYE TO GOING OUT
This isn’t necessarily a bad thing but you realise being two hermits in the house with the dogs and Netflix to entertain you is something that you wanna do all the time? You can’t leave the house when you know your partner will be cuddled up in bed with the dogs soaking up the love without you! In no way can you have them loving him more than you right?
Don’t you find you’re eating more? I’ve never been good at maths so can’t do a big portion and a half of that portion, I just cook everything double coz there’s two of us right? If he has 4 chicken breasts and two steaks I do too … everything’s split half and half so basically, I’m eating like a bodybuilder … no wonder I don’t fit into my clothes anymore.
Don’t you find cleaning and tidying up after two people isn’t just double the effort somehow it’s like quadruple! you’re tidying up after a group of 10 guys who have just come back on a stag do.. where does all this mess come from? Please note I do believe most of this is me … but I’m not taking all the blame for this one.
HELLO DOGS BYE BYE SEXY TIME
Having dogs are like having babies, so believe me when I say forget all those massive sessions you used to have because any noise made in the bedroom leads to the dogs going crazy downstairs barking to the point the neighbours knock on the door or they come up the stairs and scratch and whine at the door… instant mood killer!
Forget all those saucy messages you used to send accompanied with a picture of you in your sexy underwear… it’s now more ‘can you get loo roll before you get home as I’m tired of using the flannel’ or ‘Can you go to pets at home and get the babies a few chew toys as they’ve just eaten your trainers … your favourite ones’
Relationships are just hilarious don’t you think? and that’s what they should be right ?